3:29-3:46pm Two.

I’m hungry. Back on track with weight watchers online and I’m realizing how much more I was eating to maintain my weight for the last 8 weeks. I’m so so close to my goal. More than just counting points, I’ve learned a lot about reason why I eat other than genuine hunger. Boredom and depression seem to be the main culprits. Mostly boredom.

Not that I have a lack of things to do with my time. More like, I have things to do that I’m not particularly interested in so instead I eat. I’m feeling overwhelmed in general for no particular reason so I eat. Or I used to eat. I’ve learned that I do this almost as a form of self punishment. Eat till I feel sick so I can’t feel anything else. But since I started my fitness journey in March I’ve pushed myself to “feel and deal” rather than “nom nom to numbness”. Nom nom to numbness wasn’t quite working out because that process called digestion happened making the fullness go away then I was back to square one. Repeat square one for 365 days and in March I found myself with an extra 25 pounds of undigested anxiety and sadness.

Feel and deal isn’t a picnic either. But I’m being a lot more open and honest in my life lately. About everything. I’m a much happier person. But right now I’m hungry.

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